sharing again about a scary moment in my life...


I feel like I've talked to several people lately who are battling fear of unknown,
and even fear of what IS known, but they just don't know how to trust God in the midst of it.

I believe He laid it on my heart to share this today,
It is a repost from a long time ago,
but hopefully the Lord will allow my heart to fall upon new ears, or be a reminder.

A reminder that He IS with you,
and that He is looking out for you, even if you don't know you need it.

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"One of the scariest moments of my life"

I feel led to share it here because I KNOW the Lord is prompting
me to write about FEAR on this blog.
About my battle with it, and about how HE has given me freedom from the chains it used to keep me in.

I will be very detailed here because I want you to be able to see God's hand in it as I now do...
and I pray that if you read this it would NOT cause you to fear yourself, but instead it would encourage you regarding God's protection.

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One morning in July 2010, I was sleeping in the guest bed in Abigail's nursery, and she was sleeping in an inclined rocker near the bed
(she slept in that to help her reflux).

I usually wore my contacts to bed for weeks at a time so I could see when I got up to nurse Abigail.
But my eyes had needed a break the night before, so I took them out.

That morning, I woke up, and because I could not see Abigail very well with no contacts in,
I thought to myself that I needed to pull her rocker closer to me, to be able to see her better.
But I didn't do it just yet, and kindof went back to sleep.
(I later came to believe this was just God preparing me to hear His prompting)

And in the next instant I just had this "instinct" (aka GOD)
that I just wanted her to be next to me, so I could just sense my little girl close.
So I reached over and slid her right up to the side of the bed,
as far up as it could go so that I could see her.
She was still sound asleep, so I went back to sleep again too.

literally LESS than 5 minutes later,
the loudest crash I think I've ever heard woke me up. Abigail started screaming and so did I.

The ceiling fan had literally COME OUT of the ceiling, and fallen to the floor.
The light, the fan, the wires, the motor...ALL of it. seriously.
Glass, wood, and metal in a heavy heap on the floor.

RIGHT where Abigail had been sleeping not 5 minutes before.
I don't need to tell you what 50 pounds of ceiling fan
could have done if it had landed on my tiny baby girl.

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Though the edge of one fan blade hit Abigail's sleeper,
she was perfectly fine...just completely scared and screaming, as was I.
Needless to say it took me a long time to get over this (and to trust using a fan again).
Fear crept (well, fell really) into my heart.
But here is where I want to point out the AMAZING protection of the Lord.
Had my eyes not been tired, I wouldn't have taken my contacts out.
Had I not taken my contacts out, I would not have been unable to see Abigail,
Had I not been unable to see her, I never would have moved her sleeper, and been prepared to have a feeling like i wanted her to be closer to me.
Had I not followed "mommy instinct" in me to want to feel her close to me...
And had I not moved her from where she was...

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(wait, there's more)

I haven't told you (shown you) the most amazing part of this story.
The DAY BEFORE this happened, we were at a 1 year old birthday party and my friend Jessi took a picture of me and Abigail.

This picture is not edited in any way, her camera was working just fine, and no other pictures came out like this.

I don't know if you believe in the supernatural, and in the Lord's protective angels...but we do.
And after this picture was taken, we KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Lord had already summoned
His angels to protect our little girl
from what would happen the next day when the fan would fall.

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crazy, right? or not.
just plain God, that's what we think.
Oh I am in tears as I write about this and see this picture. God is SO good.

The point in sharing this with you in regards to fear, is that my desire is
to live expectant that God will protect.
I believe that as humans, protection is one of the main fears we struggle with.
I want to live in expectation that He will orchestrate HIS plans in my (and my children's) best interest, because He loves me.

"For He will command His angels concerning you, to guard you in all your ways.
they will life you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone..."
Psalm 91:11

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whew. I am always blown away at the goodness of God when I remember what happened.
Parker has to remind me of this story sometimes when I am tempted to fear involving my children.
or really, when I am tempted to fear anything.
He reminds me that even when I was ASLEEP, God provided protection by waking me and giving me the feelings He did.

So I guess I felt led to share this again today because
I have a strong sense in my spirit that someone needs to read this...
Someone needs to KNOW that God IS capable of supernatural protection.
Someone needs to remember that He is trustworthy.
Someone needs to know that even if YOU have no idea you need to protect, prevent, or defend something,
HE does.
He already knew, and already knows, exactly what is needed.
He has your and your family's best interest at heart.
He is good.