This blogging thing had me stretched and stressed for a long time. It shouldn't have but it did.
Not the sharing life part, but the time and effort part. The prioritizing life part. The I-suck-at-time-management part. I can look back over the years a realize I was putting pressure on it, so then I just got overwhelmed and walked away from it (an MO I am learning to overcome in every area of my life!)...other than a few random "catch up" posts here and there.
But lately...the Lord has been teaching me and showing me the difference between doing things that are from my own strength versus doing things that are from HIS. And doing things out of striving versus doing them from the overflow of my heart. And I'll let you take a guess at which one is ALWAYS more fruitful.
So, as He has been "luring" me back in to blogging (yes, it does kindof feel that way, lol)...I have fought it. I have opened it up and closed it right back down. But then He reminds me how important it is to my heart AND to His heart that I share my life and my stories. HE is drawing me back in to this space. What started as a place where I just needed to "get it out" when I was going through our first miscarriage, became a place of pressure over the years. But He has been showing me that in a way, I need to get back to how it started...but not in a going-backwards-in-life kind of way, but in a moving-forward-into-a-new-season kind of way.
But all this to say...I am taking the pressure off. I've been learning to do that in SO many areas. It is SO so freeing to live my days NOT out of my own strength...and to do ALL the things He has put in front of me to do from HIS strength.
This season is seriously the CRAZIEST and BUSIEST I've ever experienced.... a 7 year old who wants to learn and talk alll the time, a 5 year old sassy active one, a 2 year old boy (nuff said), and a 6 month old baby...plus a business and a home to run, and all that comes with that. But Y'ALL. As I press into the fact that He is the one in charge of my days, and that I literally can rely on His energy and joy and strength...things don't have to seem so cray.
So when I am tired, inconsistent, weary, impatient, overwhelmed, etc...I can remember this:
That the One writing this season of my story is the opposite: He is STEADY. He is CONSISTENT. He is STABLE. He has LOVE and JOY and PEACE for me...it's all mine for the taking. It's all mine to use in whatever thing I need to use it for. What a relief, right?
So...I am following my heart here when it comes to this blog (and to many other things in my life right now)...which means I am following the truth that if He is the one orchestrating it all, that it will indeed be good and peaceful, because He is good and He is peace.
What is He asking you to do right now that you need to quit relying on yourself to do? What is that thing He keeps drawing you into that requires HIS strength and not your own to do it?